I am moving over to the dark side.
tumblr, that is.
I've been following a few guys' tumblr pages and really enjoyed the design capabilities, as well as the user base (it seems no one uses blogger anymore, at least nobody in my target demographic), so I have decided to switch over.
Any and all posts from here on out will be posted on my tumblr page (link below).
I will keep this blog up for archival purposes, as some of my older rants and my testimony are quite long and could throw my new page into a funk.
Here is the link to my new blog. Use it well. Click Here Nao
Alright then. That's settled.
Love you, blogger.
~@
March 31, 2010
March 25, 2010
A Call To Arms
I'm really tired of waiting around for something to happen. I know impatience is a bad thing, but I honestly feel like I should be doing something proactive about my calling rather than just kinda sit around and sing all the time. That being said, I would like to enlist your help.
Here is what I believe to be my calling for ministry (what I hope to do with my life for Christ, to those who didn't quite understand right away):
I feel that God has led me to head up a metal band similar to For Today, Sleeping Giant, Underoath, ITMOL, The Crimson Armada, APFP, TDWP, etc (these are not my sole influences, but just some bigger names in the industry). The goal is to sing/scream for said band, making a unique sound that will help us stand out (quite crucial really) and to bring the gospel to the previously unreachable metal masses. If you have ever gone to a metal concert, you can plainly see that the hearts of these kids are extremely passionate, but VERY often misled. They feed off hate, and most of them have had a terrible experience with Christ before, due to us stupid Christians being so misleading with our faith.
In order to fulfill this calling, though, I need to find a band (obviously). For a long time (about a year), I had struggled to even scream properly, but about a month ago kinda got my start doing it right, and am progressing. My first plan is to do vocal covers for two reasons: 1) is that I practice more frequently when I want to cover things for perfection's sake, and 2) I can record said covers and post them on the internet to kinda give people a taste of my style.
About a year ago, I had put out an APB for musicians who just wanted to play in a band period. I had stated that it would be Christian, but had really no serious intentions other than maybe playing a show or two at bars or something someday. A couple guys whom I love dearly stepped up, and we've been "a band" since. The thing is, we don't practice very often, we're not getting any better with our instruments (I sort of am, but not a whole lot yet), and as they're both still in high school sophomores, it doesn't appear that we'll be doing anything major any time soon. I also am not certain that their hearts are where mine is in terms of absolute calling. I know they have good intentions, but what I need is a band wholly dedicated to Jesus; not the music or the fans or the money or fame or whatever. Jesus. And I'm not saying that these dudes are like that, but some things indicate a lack of absolute dedication that I want.
All that being said, I am seeking help. I need a band. Ideally, I could find a band just shy of a singer who are all set like I am on ministry through the music, and nothing more. Unfortunately for me, most bands like that have a dead-set vocalist who appears the most dedicated (aka will not step down). So I have no problem starting from scratch really, as that seems to be what's going to happen anyway. What I need are some people (no gender requirement, though methinks not many of you ladies are all too into metal itself) who are good with their instruments, like blessed by God good, with willing hearts
and a calling to do music for Jesus.
Said persons will not need tour-worthy gear YET, but must be willing to set aside money to get some. Being in a band is a lot more costly than a lot of people think.
This will not be a soft-style band. There will be blood. Granted, I do enjoy throwing a good falsetto into the mix, by and large, this band will be intensity, passion, energy, and most importantly, love. So if you're looking to play Jack Johnson or The Beatles style stuff, look elsewhere.
I do plan on making this my job. Ideally I would also work with a design company, record company, promotion, or recording stuff too, but primarily it would be ministry, much like a worship pastor at a church, only my church is comprised of dark, smelly stages and pissed off kids as my congregation (though I'm not aiming to preach per se).
Also, it would be fitting to say that I do intend on finishing my schooling (Lord willing) before doing anything like touring the entire country. I am on track to graduate in May of 2011. That does not mean, however, that we will wait until then to practice, play shows, promote, or write music. Getting a band off the ground is going to take time, so I feel that staying in school while I can is a smart move.
Musicians that I am looking for are:
-Guitarists. I would like at least two, as that provides a wider range of writing capabilities, but I know several great bands with only one guitarist.
-Bass player. You and the drummer are the backbone, the "heavy" of our sound, primarily. Guitars help, but you need to be REALLY good with scales to make the metal awesome.
-Drummer. Double bass pedal work is a must. I have a really ghetto set at my house if you don't own one, but methinks any highly talented drummer is talented because (s)he plays their own set a lot.
*Keyboardist. This is optional, but sampling can really liven up the sound and bring a lot to the table for a band.
*Other vocalist(s). This is, again, optional. This should also be tied into other band members for backup vocals only, or some switch off parts. I don't mean to come across as controlling, but I LOVE to sing, and my screaming is fairly unique which makes harmonizing and such a bit more awkward.
Clendis and David, I'm not cutting you guys from the band or anything, I'm just making it an open forum. I love you guys a ton, but I need that dedication. If you're serious about this, we need to get crackin' on our instruments, and not just jamming together but practicing by ourselves as well.
To the rest of you, if you, or someone you know, feels that you/they fit what I'm looking for, please contact me somehow about it, and we'll get to work on the whole mess.
Also, if you know of any bands that are looking for a vocalist and fit this description, PLEASE inform me and/or them! I understand this is a long shot, but you never know until you try, right?
Also also, if you can think of any songs you want me to do a vocal cover of, hit me up and I'll do my best. Please try to stick within the metal-esque genre, as trying to scream a pop song just doesn't work too well. I also do clean singing covers to some pop/rock stuff (Mayday Parade, All Time Low, etc.) so those would be fine as well. I just want to improve and get a "portfolio" of sorts going.
Also also also, if you know of any OTHER ways of getting my call to arms out there, please let me know. It's kind of a hard thing to intentionally do in Arizona, it seems.
That's about it. Thanks for reading, and please help me out! I know God is faithful and will provide, I simply wanted to do my best to get something done myself so I'm not being lazy about it.
Bless you,
~@othern
P.S. Sorry for not keeping this blog updated too much, but I've been in a hustle to get stuff done in the past few weeks, and really haven't done much writing, even for school or myself, so I apologize to anyone who might read this. I'll try to keep it more regular. Maybe I just need more fiber in my diet, ha.
Here is what I believe to be my calling for ministry (what I hope to do with my life for Christ, to those who didn't quite understand right away):
I feel that God has led me to head up a metal band similar to For Today, Sleeping Giant, Underoath, ITMOL, The Crimson Armada, APFP, TDWP, etc (these are not my sole influences, but just some bigger names in the industry). The goal is to sing/scream for said band, making a unique sound that will help us stand out (quite crucial really) and to bring the gospel to the previously unreachable metal masses. If you have ever gone to a metal concert, you can plainly see that the hearts of these kids are extremely passionate, but VERY often misled. They feed off hate, and most of them have had a terrible experience with Christ before, due to us stupid Christians being so misleading with our faith.
In order to fulfill this calling, though, I need to find a band (obviously). For a long time (about a year), I had struggled to even scream properly, but about a month ago kinda got my start doing it right, and am progressing. My first plan is to do vocal covers for two reasons: 1) is that I practice more frequently when I want to cover things for perfection's sake, and 2) I can record said covers and post them on the internet to kinda give people a taste of my style.
About a year ago, I had put out an APB for musicians who just wanted to play in a band period. I had stated that it would be Christian, but had really no serious intentions other than maybe playing a show or two at bars or something someday. A couple guys whom I love dearly stepped up, and we've been "a band" since. The thing is, we don't practice very often, we're not getting any better with our instruments (I sort of am, but not a whole lot yet), and as they're both still in high school sophomores, it doesn't appear that we'll be doing anything major any time soon. I also am not certain that their hearts are where mine is in terms of absolute calling. I know they have good intentions, but what I need is a band wholly dedicated to Jesus; not the music or the fans or the money or fame or whatever. Jesus. And I'm not saying that these dudes are like that, but some things indicate a lack of absolute dedication that I want.
All that being said, I am seeking help. I need a band. Ideally, I could find a band just shy of a singer who are all set like I am on ministry through the music, and nothing more. Unfortunately for me, most bands like that have a dead-set vocalist who appears the most dedicated (aka will not step down). So I have no problem starting from scratch really, as that seems to be what's going to happen anyway. What I need are some people (no gender requirement, though methinks not many of you ladies are all too into metal itself) who are good with their instruments, like blessed by God good, with willing hearts
and a calling to do music for Jesus.
Said persons will not need tour-worthy gear YET, but must be willing to set aside money to get some. Being in a band is a lot more costly than a lot of people think.
This will not be a soft-style band. There will be blood. Granted, I do enjoy throwing a good falsetto into the mix, by and large, this band will be intensity, passion, energy, and most importantly, love. So if you're looking to play Jack Johnson or The Beatles style stuff, look elsewhere.
I do plan on making this my job. Ideally I would also work with a design company, record company, promotion, or recording stuff too, but primarily it would be ministry, much like a worship pastor at a church, only my church is comprised of dark, smelly stages and pissed off kids as my congregation (though I'm not aiming to preach per se).
Also, it would be fitting to say that I do intend on finishing my schooling (Lord willing) before doing anything like touring the entire country. I am on track to graduate in May of 2011. That does not mean, however, that we will wait until then to practice, play shows, promote, or write music. Getting a band off the ground is going to take time, so I feel that staying in school while I can is a smart move.
Musicians that I am looking for are:
-Guitarists. I would like at least two, as that provides a wider range of writing capabilities, but I know several great bands with only one guitarist.
-Bass player. You and the drummer are the backbone, the "heavy" of our sound, primarily. Guitars help, but you need to be REALLY good with scales to make the metal awesome.
-Drummer. Double bass pedal work is a must. I have a really ghetto set at my house if you don't own one, but methinks any highly talented drummer is talented because (s)he plays their own set a lot.
*Keyboardist. This is optional, but sampling can really liven up the sound and bring a lot to the table for a band.
*Other vocalist(s). This is, again, optional. This should also be tied into other band members for backup vocals only, or some switch off parts. I don't mean to come across as controlling, but I LOVE to sing, and my screaming is fairly unique which makes harmonizing and such a bit more awkward.
Clendis and David, I'm not cutting you guys from the band or anything, I'm just making it an open forum. I love you guys a ton, but I need that dedication. If you're serious about this, we need to get crackin' on our instruments, and not just jamming together but practicing by ourselves as well.
To the rest of you, if you, or someone you know, feels that you/they fit what I'm looking for, please contact me somehow about it, and we'll get to work on the whole mess.
Also, if you know of any bands that are looking for a vocalist and fit this description, PLEASE inform me and/or them! I understand this is a long shot, but you never know until you try, right?
Also also, if you can think of any songs you want me to do a vocal cover of, hit me up and I'll do my best. Please try to stick within the metal-esque genre, as trying to scream a pop song just doesn't work too well. I also do clean singing covers to some pop/rock stuff (Mayday Parade, All Time Low, etc.) so those would be fine as well. I just want to improve and get a "portfolio" of sorts going.
Also also also, if you know of any OTHER ways of getting my call to arms out there, please let me know. It's kind of a hard thing to intentionally do in Arizona, it seems.
That's about it. Thanks for reading, and please help me out! I know God is faithful and will provide, I simply wanted to do my best to get something done myself so I'm not being lazy about it.
Bless you,
~@othern
P.S. Sorry for not keeping this blog updated too much, but I've been in a hustle to get stuff done in the past few weeks, and really haven't done much writing, even for school or myself, so I apologize to anyone who might read this. I'll try to keep it more regular. Maybe I just need more fiber in my diet, ha.
March 09, 2010
Thingsome (Poem)
I'm kinda breaking my own rules here, and wrote a poem instead of lyrics, though I suppose one could potentially alter it a bit and make it music-worthy. I was browsing a poetry website and just got a wave of inspiration by the title "Something" by Maddaline Liotta. I didn't even read the poem (though I'm sure it's great), but I just went on a writing craze. Here is the result:
I thought it was pretty cool.
Anyway, I've gotta get to bed. One week until spring break for me, which means I just might churn out some new writing in a week or so. Stay tuned, and give me ideas on what to write about!
lovelovelovelovelovelovelove,
~@othern
there is always something.
you cannot grasp it
you cannot find it
you want it, no, need it
there is always something.
the pursuit of happiness
forms a wide circle of confusion
and insatiable thirsts
there is always something.
no leaves remain unturned
no shadows unsearched
no hands that have gone without holding
there is always something.
every sweet, bitter morsel
all refreshing swash
come and gone, turned to ashes
there is always something.
nets and traps cannot keep it
nor can it be contained at all
yet within us it lies dormant
and ready to be had
there is always something.
I thought it was pretty cool.
Anyway, I've gotta get to bed. One week until spring break for me, which means I just might churn out some new writing in a week or so. Stay tuned, and give me ideas on what to write about!
lovelovelovelovelovelovelove,
~@othern
February 24, 2010
Neckbolts That Say Otherwise (Song)
New song, yay! I had the first two lines written a long time ago, and just tonight finished off the rest of it. Quick explanation: I took the multiple Old-Testament scriptures about shepherds leading their flocks astray (e.g., Jeremiah 50:6), and mixed it with a Frankenstein/Beauty and the Beast kinda feel. The end piece is roughly cut from Zechariah 13:7 as well.
Yep, that's all he wrote. For now.
Just one tidbit of news and then I'm going to bed. My mom found my firewire (the cable that connects my video camera to my PC) so I FINALLY uploaded my three old vocal covers from when I was using fry screaming. They're on my facebook if you want to check them out. As a consequence (a good one) of this, I am hereby going to be making other cover videos as I practice my singing/screaming, and will happily take requests, though not all requests may be actually covered (depends on style, lyrics, etc.).
Okay, bye-bye now.
lovelovelovelovelovelovelove,
~@othern
Oh misled flock, where have your eyes gone?
They're as vacant as your chest.
I've never left you to the lions before,
But it seems I've been harboring worse all along.
I've created a monster...
It's alive, it's alive!
Grab your swords, your pitchforks and
Let's put this beast to...
I am the shepherd of the fallen ones,
And my pasture is chaos and despair.
Don't look for comfort in my care.
My flock is for the slaughter.
Oh children of Zion! How I have failed you.
I've create a monster...
It's alive, it's alive!
Grab your swords, your pitchforks and
Let's put this beast to...death.
Smite the shepherd, kill the beast
Smite the shepherd, kill the beast
Spare the lamb, spare the lamb
Spare the lamb, spare the lamb
Yep, that's all he wrote. For now.
Just one tidbit of news and then I'm going to bed. My mom found my firewire (the cable that connects my video camera to my PC) so I FINALLY uploaded my three old vocal covers from when I was using fry screaming. They're on my facebook if you want to check them out. As a consequence (a good one) of this, I am hereby going to be making other cover videos as I practice my singing/screaming, and will happily take requests, though not all requests may be actually covered (depends on style, lyrics, etc.).
Okay, bye-bye now.
lovelovelovelovelovelovelove,
~@othern
February 19, 2010
Bootstomp The Forked End (Song)
I'm back again. Sorry about not updating. Once again, life has decided to take over my life (ha) so my usual free time has been shortened to the point where I rarely have time to even THINK of writing. As it were, I will update you on some things after the lyrics and explanation.
Explanation: I took the idea of the serpent being the representation of temptation in the Garden (of Eden) and used that to essentially sum up my constant struggle and attitude towards it. It seems like I am destined to willingly turn my back on Christ for a cheap thrill or two, and I feel like I'm missing out on God's unending love for me by doing so.
Anyway, there are a couple other things I wanted to inform you on. The first is that my vocals have improved. This may seem like a big-whoop moment for you, but for a guy who believes he's called to use his voice to show Christ's love, it means a helluva lot. That being said, my vocals have indeed gotten better, but they still aren't great. I figured this would happen, but I have a great outlook on improvement within the next year or so that I'll still be in school.
Other things I wish to write to you about are:
I read The Shack, that super controversial novel about meeting God for a weekend in a shack. I will say shorthand-like that I enjoyed it thoroughly, and God used it to reveal some truths that I'd never before really considered. Yes, there are inconsistencies, but with a little discernment and a logical approach, you can see the intent behind these fallacies and actually use them to benefit your understanding better. I can and probably will do a full write-up of it, a sort of counter-argument to most of the criticisms when I find the time.
Since then, I've picked up Don Miller's latest, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. So far, it's pretty boss. But it isn't jam-packed with spiritual insight like most of his other work was, at least within the first section. A bit of a shock, but not necessarily disappointing. The reading is still very good and quite funny, and I'd expect nothing less.
I've been getting really involved in the local music scene, or at least trying to lately. Apparently there are quite a few God-fearing local bands that I feel you should check out, if you're into the style of music that I am.
The King's Divide
City In The Sea
Monsters of Maple Street
These dudes are legit, and even though they aren't pro, I'd say they've got potential.
Something big that's going on in my life is a ministry shift. Let me explain. For the past 4-5 years or so I've been involved with a ministry called Young Life which reaches out to the lost in high schools via friendship and various activities to hang out at. It's a really great organization, the people are generally awesome, and the kids are the best part (aside from Jesus being with you, obvs). However, this year has been a bit of a struggle for me. For one thing, our "staffing" of leaders have dwindled, and our decade-long head leader recently dropped out of the game for awhile. I am basically the most experienced leader on our team, which, coupled with the fact that I don't really feel that Young Life is my calling, is stressful.
To add to the whole mess, a new college ministry is starting up called Refuge. It's basically a Saturday night church service aimed at young adults (18-25 ish). Our college bible study is "planting" it, and naturally, feeling that I am called to sing, I have committed to a year's worth of attendance and work towards this ministry. The problem is, Young Life can be very demanding if you do it right, and if you aren't doing it right - if your heart isn't 110% into the work - they basically don't want you (it sounds harsher than it really is, but it's the kind of work ethic they want).
So I'm essentially torn. I want to pursue music ministry with this church and eventually a band, but I don't want to leave the kids, or hand the leadership burdens to the inexperienced and possibly cause a collapse.
I've also become increasingly concerned with my other abilities that would be necessary for a band ministry. For instance, I've never been onstage music-wise since I was in a church choir when I was like six. So stage presence is a concern. I've also never fit lyrics to instrumental music, nor written melody for singing/screaming before. So that really worries me. I guess I'm just saying please pray that these things come with experience, and quickly enough to accomplish God's purposes.
Speaking of, I am especially concerned about my periodic sinful ventures keeping me from fulfilling God's will. Plainly speaking, I'm terrified that I'll continue to turn my back on Him, and He will deem me unusable, and I will never accomplish what He has for me. It's a real downer.
Anyway, I think that's about all I have for now. I might be (hopefully) writing another blog or two within the month (haha). The topics: unknown, but I want to write more. It's a good way of clearing my mind, you know?
As always, feel free to talk to me, text me, email me, twitter me, ask me anonymously (see right), comment me, or whatever. I'm open to criticism, compliment, suggestions, requests, declarations, and the like.
lovelovelovelovelovelove,
~@othern
I made a veil; it hides my shame
So nothing but good comes with my name
I am a fraud, but at least I admit it
I am a fraud, and somehow I can't quit it
I can't live my life
Failure by failure
My weary heart is dying
From all this denying
Of love
I know not what you speak
Of love
Say what you really mean
Of love
Oh how I long to feel
Of love
Something that's never real to me
I can't decipher; the vipers
They cloak lies in whispers
Seductive, selective, destructive
I eat it up, eat it up
Dripping fangs of deceit and regret
I welcome the feast of innocence
And their venom keeps me denying
Your love
I know not what you speak
Of love
Say what you really mean
Of love
Oh how I long to feel
Your love
Something that's never real to me
Put an end to the torment and
Crush the head of the serpent
Crush the head of the serpent
Crush the head of the serpent
Explanation: I took the idea of the serpent being the representation of temptation in the Garden (of Eden) and used that to essentially sum up my constant struggle and attitude towards it. It seems like I am destined to willingly turn my back on Christ for a cheap thrill or two, and I feel like I'm missing out on God's unending love for me by doing so.
Anyway, there are a couple other things I wanted to inform you on. The first is that my vocals have improved. This may seem like a big-whoop moment for you, but for a guy who believes he's called to use his voice to show Christ's love, it means a helluva lot. That being said, my vocals have indeed gotten better, but they still aren't great. I figured this would happen, but I have a great outlook on improvement within the next year or so that I'll still be in school.
Other things I wish to write to you about are:
I read The Shack, that super controversial novel about meeting God for a weekend in a shack. I will say shorthand-like that I enjoyed it thoroughly, and God used it to reveal some truths that I'd never before really considered. Yes, there are inconsistencies, but with a little discernment and a logical approach, you can see the intent behind these fallacies and actually use them to benefit your understanding better. I can and probably will do a full write-up of it, a sort of counter-argument to most of the criticisms when I find the time.
Since then, I've picked up Don Miller's latest, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. So far, it's pretty boss. But it isn't jam-packed with spiritual insight like most of his other work was, at least within the first section. A bit of a shock, but not necessarily disappointing. The reading is still very good and quite funny, and I'd expect nothing less.
I've been getting really involved in the local music scene, or at least trying to lately. Apparently there are quite a few God-fearing local bands that I feel you should check out, if you're into the style of music that I am.
The King's Divide
City In The Sea
Monsters of Maple Street
These dudes are legit, and even though they aren't pro, I'd say they've got potential.
Something big that's going on in my life is a ministry shift. Let me explain. For the past 4-5 years or so I've been involved with a ministry called Young Life which reaches out to the lost in high schools via friendship and various activities to hang out at. It's a really great organization, the people are generally awesome, and the kids are the best part (aside from Jesus being with you, obvs). However, this year has been a bit of a struggle for me. For one thing, our "staffing" of leaders have dwindled, and our decade-long head leader recently dropped out of the game for awhile. I am basically the most experienced leader on our team, which, coupled with the fact that I don't really feel that Young Life is my calling, is stressful.
To add to the whole mess, a new college ministry is starting up called Refuge. It's basically a Saturday night church service aimed at young adults (18-25 ish). Our college bible study is "planting" it, and naturally, feeling that I am called to sing, I have committed to a year's worth of attendance and work towards this ministry. The problem is, Young Life can be very demanding if you do it right, and if you aren't doing it right - if your heart isn't 110% into the work - they basically don't want you (it sounds harsher than it really is, but it's the kind of work ethic they want).
So I'm essentially torn. I want to pursue music ministry with this church and eventually a band, but I don't want to leave the kids, or hand the leadership burdens to the inexperienced and possibly cause a collapse.
I've also become increasingly concerned with my other abilities that would be necessary for a band ministry. For instance, I've never been onstage music-wise since I was in a church choir when I was like six. So stage presence is a concern. I've also never fit lyrics to instrumental music, nor written melody for singing/screaming before. So that really worries me. I guess I'm just saying please pray that these things come with experience, and quickly enough to accomplish God's purposes.
Speaking of, I am especially concerned about my periodic sinful ventures keeping me from fulfilling God's will. Plainly speaking, I'm terrified that I'll continue to turn my back on Him, and He will deem me unusable, and I will never accomplish what He has for me. It's a real downer.
Anyway, I think that's about all I have for now. I might be (hopefully) writing another blog or two within the month (haha). The topics: unknown, but I want to write more. It's a good way of clearing my mind, you know?
As always, feel free to talk to me, text me, email me, twitter me, ask me anonymously (see right), comment me, or whatever. I'm open to criticism, compliment, suggestions, requests, declarations, and the like.
lovelovelovelovelovelove,
~@othern
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